Most of us are hyper-aware of the words we say, choosing them carefully and ensuring that the tone of voice we deliver them in can’t be misunderstood easily.

That’s a good start, but all of your hard work in that department could easily be wiped out if you’re not aware of what your body is saying.

We’ve all heard of the term ‘body language’, but do you actually pay it much attention? You might watch other people and look at their body language, but what about your own? Does it do you any favours? Does it tell people the right story about you? Or, probably more likely, does it betray you completely?

The key to turning the situation around is being aware of what your body language is saying about you.

For instance, what about your posture? Do you slump your shoulders? Do you walk with your head down? How about when you’re sitting, do you slump downwards? All of this is extremley negative and gives the impression of someone who is perhaps lazy, lacking in energy, tired, unengaged in the task or conversation they’re in the middle of, etc. If you’re in a job interview or you’re speaking to someone who is perhaps a little upset, these types of posture issues could cause them to get the wrong impression of you entirely!

Instead, why not focus on doing it all right, and ensuring that everyone takes you the way you want to be taken?

A few ideas for positive body language include:

• Sit up straight – Don’t slouch. Lift your shoulders and roll them up, back, and round, to give you the right posture. However, avoid sitting ram-rod straight, as this simply makes you look like you’re trying too hard.
• Lift your head up – Walking with your head down or avoiding eye contact makes you look either totally lacking in confidence or completely uninterested, possibly both! Make eye contact with the person you’re speaking to, and avoid walking with your head down. Hold your head up high and take in the scenery around you.
• Avoid crossing your arms or legs over your body – This is a defensive stance and makes it look like yo’ure holding something back or trying to protect yourself. Instead, sit with your legs uncrossed, and avoid crossing your arms over your body.
• Stop fidgeting! – If you’re an unconscious fidgeter, e.g. you’re always messing with the cuff of your shirt, messing with your hair, tapping your fingers, or picking your nails, stop! This shows that you’re bored, distracted, and can also show that you’re lying and trying to avoid making eye contact.

Start off these with pointers first. Trying to overload your brain with what to do and what not to do can totally confuse your brain, and make it more likely that you do something which causes negative body language to occur. Simply be relaxed, be you, and try not to look like you’re hiding something!

The fact is, body language can change your words quite easily. If you’re saying you’re fine but you’re avoiding making eye contact, fidgeting, and you seem aggitated, nobody is going to believe you. Words mean nothing if you don’t back them up with positive body language.